Writing Portfolio 

By

Elise Knebusch

Table of Contents

Introduction                                                                                                                      3

The Munks of Point Pelee                                                                                                  4

Rubie                                                                                                                               13

Circle K.                                                                                                                           20

Remembering Home                                                                                                        26

Ciao, Ciao for Now Chapter 1: Nicola                                                                             33

Ciao, Ciao for Now Chapter 2: Rebecca                                                                          44

Introduction

When I was in high school, I went through what every other high school student went through: what will I be when I am older? After much consideration, I decided to come to school for film production. The more film classes I took, the more I realized that I did not like the technical side of film. I enjoyed writing my projects rather than producing them. Learning this made me decide to add a writing minor to my curriculum. The writing minor helped shape me as a writer and allow me to explore all genres and topics.

The pieces I decided to share through this portfolio all show a small piece of who I am as a person. Whether that be an idea I had in a dream, a place I have traveled to, an actual experience that has happened in my life, or just a story based around someone I have briefly met. I enjoy writing about topics that don’t quite give you all the answers. In life, we experience things that teach you a lesson; you never exactly have all the answers on how to handle the same experience in the future. In my 21 years of life, I have learned many things, but not enough to be able to give all the answers. The characters I have written have gone through similar lessons I have been taught in life and have hopefully learned from them. We may never know the answers to everything in life. I personallyprefer to write about more realistic topics rather than fantasies. Our reality is just as much a mystery to me as some of the fantasy stories I have read. I hope that the readers of my portfolio learn something from my writing or just enjoy reading the adventures my characters go on.

Elise Knebusch

The Munks of Point Pelee

 “Good morning, Chip! Couldn’t sleep?” Chip glared at Deloris and groaned.

 Deloris could be seen sitting outside her burrow through Chip’s window. Deloris chuckled to herself as she sipped her acorn cup of tea. Chip has never been a morning munk. He is more of the businessman; everything must be done according to the “book” type of person. He lives his life exactly the way Mother Nature claims a chipmunk should live their life: hibernate in the winter and collect food, take care of their family, spread fungi to help the trees survive in the spring, summer, and autumn. Deloris lives her life how she wants to live. She doesn’t care about chipmunk “norms” and lives an unproblematic happy life, while Chip likes to make sure he fits in with society byworking and watching the humans practice hockey during their off season.

Chip spent his childhood in a private munk school studying to be one of the scientists studying the effects human food has on a munk’s body. Point Peelee is one of the only places in Canada that has a government run by munks. Everywhere else in the world, munks just run free causing havoc on the other animals. Other munks will steal food from each other and it’s every munk for themselves. Here in Point Peele, we live in a civilized society. We help each other out and are in constant competition with the humans. We believe that the humans are ruining the planet. Our goal is to outsmart the humans one day and become the head species but until that happens, we all do our part to keep our civilization going. Having to hibernate every winter makes our studies take a lot longer than we expected. Some of the head munks will skip hibernation to keep up with their studies, but most decide to hibernate. Chip now works for the lead munks to continue his research during the warmer months. Working all the time has made him bitter and angry. He doesn’t get free time like some of the other munks. He’s never taken a vacation and has never been anywhere outside of his neighborhood. He claims he is always too tired to take weekends trips. He mostly just drinks acorn beer while watching sports during the weekend. His life has become quite boring as sad compared to the other chipmunks in his community.

The wind started to pick up making Deloris put her acorn cup of tea down and hunker back into her burrow to be far enough out of the wind. She watched as Chip made his way out of his burrow to stretch while shivering from the wind. The snow and wind were much more intense this year than it had been in the past. Every tree, bush, and shrub were covered in at least three inches of ice and snow. Even the benches that were put in the park by humans were coated in layers of ice.

“I can’t believe this is the second winter in a row that I haven’t been able to sleep through! I don’t like being awake in this weather!” Chip yelled shaking his tiny fist into the wind.

“Stop being so dramatic, Chip. The snow can be beautiful,” Deloris replied. Chip gave Deloris the side-eyeand scampered up the tree to get closer to the sun.

Deloris ignored Chip’s negativity and went back into her burrow. She planned on sprucing the place up a bit during the winter. She was never a fan of hibernating. She preferred to just people watch, paint and enjoy the snow. She had found some holly berries earlier that day and was planning on using them to paint a mural on her wall. Shewould even pick berries before they were ripe to create some green and yellow shades for her wall. She loved painting, more than most other chipmunks; others just used berries to paint their walls all one color. Deloris loved painting designs and murals on her walls. Even though they just wash away when it would rain, she still loves her hobby. She has always been the most creative chipmunk.

Chip sat in the sun with his arms crossed. “Winter is the absolute worst!” he thought. There was nothing for him to do during the winter. It was too dangerous to leave the tree and everybody he liked to hang out with was still in hibernation mode.

The snow started to slow down as Chip bundled up with threads and leaves that he had made into a snowsuit; he had found the supplies throughout the forest and used a twig to sew them together. He decided that sitting around was too boring for him and he wanted to find some entertainment.

After a few hours of grumpily sitting in the sun people watching, Chip made his way back down to his and Deloris’ neck of the woods to check in on her. Deloris is an older munk who refuses to hibernate making the other munks tend to worry but she doesn’t listen to them. She was focused on painting her mural to notice when Chip arrived.

“What exactly do you do all winter? Don’t ya get bored?” Chip asked. Deloris jumped when he started to talk.

“Jeez! You scared me!” She held her hand to her chest. “Um… Well, not really. I enjoy the quiet, and I findways to entertain myself.”

“Like what? There’s nothing to do.” Chip said as he rested against her entryway and watched as shepainted.

“Well, when I was younger, I would travel, but now I just stay home and paint and relax.” She explained while still being focused on her painting. Chip nodded in response and then stayed there, silent, for three full hours!

Deloris was just about done with her mural and was curious about why Chip was still hanging around. He never paid attention to her in the summer. All he had ever cared about was trying to steal snacks from the campers and trying to be the fastest at gathering fungus for the trees. “He needs to loosen up.” Deloris thought to herself. “Maybe some light yoga would get him to relax a little.”

“So, what exactly are you doing here Chip?” She looked at him curiously waiting for a response. “I mean,don’t get me wrong, I enjoy your company.”

“Do you think there is more to life than just working in the summer and hibernating in the winter?” he answered. His question caught Deloris off guard. He never thought about life as more than a thing that is used to eat food, work, and sleep.

“Well… Um… I’m not sure, I think it depends on the munk and what they want to accomplish in their life. Is there something you want to do before you die?” She stammered back at him. Chip just looked at her, Slightlydisappointed in her answer.

“Oh, okay. I was just curious. You seem to be the only truly happy munk out here.

 Sometimes I think we only hibernate to get away from our boring lives.” Chip shifted uncomfortably whilewaiting for a response. Deloris wasn’t used to another munk coming to her when having a midlife crisis.

The rest just ate a ton of acorns and seeds until they are mistaken for a squirrel. She pushed her confusedthoughts aside. She had an idea that might help.

“Do you want to know a secret?” She smirked at Chip. He just nodded, with a puzzled look on his facethen followed Deloris as she climbed down the tree.

She stopped on a branch near the ground, but far enough away that the humans couldn’t notice them. She didn’t say anything, but she did start to make these weird body movements that Chip had never seen before. He stood there, staring at her confused. Deloris continued her movements until she noticed Chip hadn’t joined her. “What? You’ve neverdone yoga before?” She asked.

“No.” Chip stated in a judgmental tone.

“Well” Deloris frowned. “Will you at least try it? It helps me feel better when I’m feeling down.” She hoped he would say yes but deep down she knew he was too cautious of how others viewed him. He would never try something that the village crazy lady was doing.

“No.” Chip said rudely. “Well. I knew it was a long-shot, but he didn’t have to be so rude about it.” Deloris thought to herself.

“Fine. If you won’t do yoga with me, let’s just sit down and people watch then?” Deloris sat down and motioned for Chip to sit down next to him. Chip scoffed and went back to his burrow. Deloris shrugged it off and went back to doing her yoga. There was no reason for her not to be happy and having fun just because Chip was angry at the world.

Chip scampered back into his burrow quickly then looked out behind him to see if any other munks had woken up early and saw him.

“How embarrassing! Not hibernating really got to her mental state.” Chip thought to himself. He hunkereddown into his burrow now realizing how cold he had gotten while out. Luckily, he still had tons of acorns and seeds still packed away at the back of his burrow for him to munch on. He crawled under some leaves and ate his snacks while looking out at the snow falling down.

The sun started to set, and Deloris finally made her way back to her burrow. She had done yoga for most of the afternoon before sitting down to people watch as the last few hikers made their way back to town beforenightfall.

On her way back, she stopped to see if Chip had made it home. He didn’t answer but Deloris noticed some acorn debris that he took out after eating the parts he liked. That gave her the ease of knowing that he was home.

The next morning, Deloris sat at the opening of her burrow sipping some tea out of her acorn teacup. Chip woke up just after sunrise. He came outside to discard of some more acorn and seed debris. He didn’t seem too happy but Deloris always tried to cheer people up.

“Good Morning Chip!” Deloris said cheerfully. Chip looked over towards her and gave her a half smile. He was taken back at how nice she was being towards him after he was so rude to her yesterday. He had spent the whole evening before watching the snow fall down and thinking. He thought that there has to be a reason as to why Deloris wanted him to join her yoga practice. He also realized that he was ashamed of himself for being so closed minded; his younger self would be so disappointed in him now.

“Good Morning Deloris.” Chip said as he walked across the branch to be closer to Deloris and sat down nextto her.

“Would you mind showing me that thing you were doing yesterday?” he asked awkwardly.

“Of course, Chip! I would love to.” Deloris smiled as she set her acorn teacup down and stood up. “Follow me” she said as she walked towards the branch they were at the day before.

They sat on the branch for hours watching as the humans hiked the trail. Some in groups or pairs, others alone. Chip started to notice that the ones alone looked sad or lost in their own world. Deloris still wasn’t saying anything, she was just watching the people smiling, which frustrated Chip.

“Okay. What are we doing here? This isn’t yoga.” He snapped at Deloris. She wasn’t shocked by this though. It actually made her laugh.

“Chip. You must first learn patience. Everything will come to you when you let it.” She got up, motioned for Chip to stay on the ice-covered tree branch, then climbed back up the tree to her burrow.

Chip huffed, crossed his arms and went back to watching people hike for fun in the frigid weather for therest of the day.

Deloris started to get her burrow ready for the night. She roasted some chestnuts for dinner and went on a hunt for a fir tree. She has found that fir tree branches make for the best wind protection. During her search, she noticed that Chip was still sitting on the branch. The sun was just below the horizon creating some light, but the stars were starting to take over the sky. The humans had gone back to their homes by now, but he still sat there with his arms crossed. She didn’t know if he had his arms crossed to keep him warm or if it was out of anger, but she just smiled and made her way back to her burrow. ‘He would either give up and go back to his grumpy old ways or finally find some inner peace.’ She thought to herself as she curled up for the night.

Chip stayed on that frozen branch all night. He couldn’t figure out why Deloris had brought him there. He didn’t care that the wind was starting to pick up and blowing spray from the dirty lake onto him. He was determined to figure out Deloris’ wacky behavior. He knew she had always been strange, but this was a new level of strange. One that he just couldn’t figure out. So, he sat there, all night and waited for the answer to come to him.

Deloris woke up at some point in the night. She put on her sweater that she made from threads she found throughout the woods and went to check to see if Chip had given up. She was surprised to see him still there.

“Still determined?” She smirked. Chip jumped when her voice came out of nowhere. “No, I gave up a while ago.” He scoffed. “I just have no intention of going back home.”

 “Do you want me to tell you?” Deloris asked. Chip looked at her briefly before turning his attention back to the lake that the moon reflected off of.

“Sure.” He shrugged. Deloris went up to him and sat down.

“Every morning when you wake up, you are home,” Deloris said. “You are where you were born and where you will most likely be for the rest of your life. We don’t get the opportunity to travel like the humans do, so every day I come down to this branch. I come to people-watch and see why they came here. Some just come here to have fun with their friends and family. Others come to give their dogs exercise. And then there are the ones, the ones that always fascinate me, the ones who come here for one specific reason. They come here because they’re unhappywith their lives. They come here to do some ‘soul-searching’ as I once heard it called.” She twitched her nose left and right the turned to face Chip. “I’ve watched these sad souls’ hike through here for years and they’ve taught me to love my life as a chipmunk. I’ve gotten the rare chance to travel in my days, but I’ve always come back home. They come here because they’re sad, but when they finally find their inner peace, they become happy. After I started to notice this trend, I realized that we live in a pretty marvelous place. A place that can make even the unhappiest beings smile again. How could I ever be unhappy in a place that makes the most complex creatures happy again?”

Chip stared at Deloris, but he still looked confused.

 “So. Why did you make me sit here all night then?” He squeaked.

 “I didn’t make you stay out here, I just suggested you stay and hoped you would try to meditate or find some inner peace.” Deloris said calmly.

“Do you think I am not living my life to the fullest? Chip asked.

“I think the real question is if you think your living your life to the fullest. Deloris responded. Chip wastaken back by her comment but knew that she was right.

“What do you suggest I do?” Chip stared out at the frozen lake as he waited for a response.

“I can only suggest you do something that will make you happy. I can’t make those decisions for you.” She answered. Chip looked at Deloris when she answered. Deloris was expecting him to be angry with her for not giving him every answer, but she was wrong. Chip smiled and stood up. He brushed the snow off his legs and started to walk back to his burrow. He looked back at Deloris and said, “I’ll be back in June.” Then he went up to hisburrow, packed some food into a bag made out of leaves and left. He left town and went up to Toronto to watch hockey. He had always wanted to know what a real hockey game was like and now knowing this brought him happiness that would keep him going until next winter. Eventually, he would go back to Toronto every winter. It took Chip most of his life to find true happiness but when he did, he did not let itdisappear from him again.

Rubie

I am running as fast as I can. I don’t know why I am running but I am. I am weaving between trees and around bushes. What am I running from? Why am I running as if my life depended on it? I slow down to a light jog to try to catch my breath but also so I would keep moving. There has to be a good reason as to why I am running. I don’t have any enemies, or at least none that I know of but even if I did, why would I be running from them?

I keep my pace up but not fast enough to be panting and out of breath. I pass a few more trees until I enter a clearing. I stop running when I notice a girl is standing in the middle of the area. She is average height and very pale. She has long black hair covering her face, a black shirt, and bright red pants. I can’t see her face yet, but I already knew that I do not know who this girl is.

She doesn’t move. I walk up to her slowly, cautious of my every move. Who is this girl? Is she going to kill me? I get to be almost three feet away from her. Her neck snaps up. She is young, probably around 12-years-old. I don’t know any 12-year-old’s, how could I be enemies with one? She makes eye contact with me. I can see the fear in her dark eyes. “Stop.” She is stern but sounds fatigued. It almost sounds like she has been here before. Her voice is deep for a young girl. I don’t listen, instead, I bolt out of here. Whatever is chasing mehas to have also chased her.

I run out of the clearing and back into the dark, thick woods. Out of nowhere it sounds like someone is right behind me. I can hear panting and feet hitting the ground. I try to turn to see who it is, but I trip over a log.

I sat up in bed panting. I can’t remember the last time I had such a bad dream. I reached over to my nightstand and turned on the light. I grabbed my phone to check the time. 3:00 AM. Some would say it’s the witching hour, I try not to think about stuff like that though. It’s not real so there’s no reason to freak myself out over nothing. I put my phone down, turned off my light, and tried to fall back to sleep. I tossed and turned allnight. Every time I closed my eyes, I saw the girl, staring me down.

My alarm went off 3 hours later. Great. It’s going to be fun trying to sit through a 2-hour history class with no sleep. I reluctantly sat up in bed and made my way to my bathroom. “I just have to get to class, I don’t have to look nice while there.” I thought to myself but then again, that’s what I say to myself every morning. I splash water on my face, throw my blonde hair up into a messy bun and brush my teeth. I have never seen such bad under eye bags in my entire life. I went to my closet and grabbed the nicest yet comfy outfit that I could find; my good sweatpants and a simple t-shirt. I threw those on and ran out the door.

I arrived at my class 5 minutes late. I gaze the room looking for a seat. I spot one next to a familiar looking head of blonde hair. My friend, Lizzy, saved me a seat in the back. “Rough night?” she joked. Lizzy and I havebeen friends since the first day of my freshman year at college. She is basically just my drinking buddy; I wouldn’t call her my best friend or anything, but she is fun to hang out with every once in a while.

“I had the weirdest dream last night.” I whispered back at her.

 “Dude. Tell me everything. I am the dream expert.” I rolled my eyes at her comment but then proceeded to tell her about my dream. I didn’t get very far before the professor called us out for talking.

“I tell you about it later.” I whispered to her before pulling out my laptop.

 I spent the rest of the class googling information about dreams. Lizzy may say she is the dream expert, but she also is a college student who drinks way too much so, how much could she really know? All I really found is that my subconscious is telling me to avoid someone or something. I don’t know who or what I should be avoiding but all I know is that I need to be more aware of my surroundings.

Close to the end of class, Lizzy texted me asking if I wanted to go out to the bars tonight. I didn’t respond. She should know that I work every night during the week. I swear, all this girl thinks about is when she will bedrunk again.

The professor dismissed us, and Lizzy and I made our way outside. It’s a chilly October day which means It’s getting closer to Halloween so everyone around us are conversing about what costume they are going to wear. Lizzy sat down at a picnic table that is outside of the building. She sat up straight and folded her hands together like a lawyer who was about to tell you you’re about to win the case.

“So. Tell me!” She is way too excited for this, she kept a big grin on her face throughout the whole conversation. I gave her a brief synopsis of my dream. But for some reason I felt the need to leave out the partwith the girl.

“Okay. One. You are being away too dramatic about it.” Lizzy rolled her eyes at me. I’m sure she would feel differently about it if she knew about the girl.

“And two. It just means that you are too stressed, and you need to take a break. I’m thinking a weekend getaway to Cabo to ease your mind?”

“Lizzy, I really don’t think a trip to Cabo is going to solve my problems. Especially since I only have like 20 bucks in my bank account.”

 “Fine. I’ll go alone. If you change your mind, I’m leaving a few days before Thanksgiving.”

“Great! I’ll let you know.” I said half sarcastic and half annoyed. She is literally no help. I stood up fromthe picnic table and grabbed my bag off the ground.

“I’ll see you tomorrow. I have to work tonight.” I stated before walking away. I wanted to get home so I could try to take a nap before work tonight. I somehow got a 5- hour gap between my classes and work every day which have been very helpful for the nap department.

I’m running. I’m running again. I’m somehow aware that I have been running in this direction before. Everything looks exactly the same, large oaks trees going who knows how high, brush, and darkness. I run up to the clearing, the one that I have been to before and to my surprise the girl is there, again. Looking exactly the same as before. I run up to her. I go to reach out for her, but she snaps her head up. “Stop.” This time she screams. Once again, I don’t feel like I can trust her. I don’t hesitate. I start sprinting in a different direction than I did last time but just like last time. I ran until the sound of the girl screaming is replaced with the sound of footsteps and panting right behind me. This time instead of investigating, I try to run faster than I ever have before, but it didn’t matter. A few seconds later I was tackled to the ground.

I sat straight up in bed panting. I punched my bed in frustration. “Who the fuck is chasing me?!?!” I yelled out as I flopped back down onto my pillow. I can’t think of anyone who is out to get me. Lizzy’s theory is just plain bullshit. I am not anymore stressed than normal, but I also don’t have anyone out to get me. Or, at least nobody that I know of.

I still have a few hours before I have to be at work, and I have no homework that’s due anytime soon so I guess I will just try to fall back asleep for a little bit. I’m exhausted.

My alarm went off an hour and a half later. I was still awake. My mind was racing the entire time. I couldn’t figure who was sabotaging me or if it was just my imagination going wild after that scary movie marathon that I had the other night. Clearly this girl was trying to help the other person. She wasn’t scary looking; she gave off a vibe that made her seem very calming and nurturing yet innocent but at the same time something about her made her untrustworthy. She can’t be the one chasing me. Could she?

I brushed all my thoughts aside and decided to clean my apartment. Cleaning always take my mind offthings; it’s why my apartment is usually freakishly clean.

When I finished cleaning my kitchen I went into my bedroom. I don’t remember my room being this messy, but I guess it has been a stressful week. I started to pick up all my blankets around my bed when I noticed that there were footprints pressed into my fluffy blanket that is at the end of my bed. I must have been sleep walking or something. I ignored it and made my bed before getting ready for work.

-

I clocked out of work and walked out of that hell hole. I worked at a 24-hour gym that is located just down the road from my apartment. It’s now 11:00 PM and pitch black out. I walk to work since it’s only a quick five minutes away but at night I sometimes get home in three since I am so scared but tonight, I am too tired to try to get home quickly. I can’t remember the last time I have been this tired. I am walking past this terrifying field on my way home, like one from a horror movie terrifying. The only thing that is giving off light tonight is the one and only streetlight on this stretch. I must be hallucinating because the girl from my dreams is standing in the middle of the field. Do I approach her? No. That’s stupid. I am not some stupid girl from a horror movie. I look away andcontinue on walking, while picking up my pace.

I was just about to enter my apartment building when I heard my phone go off. A message from Lizzy popped up; “Where are you? I thought you were coming out tonight.” Most of her words were misspelled, she’s clearly very drunk. I’ve gotten used to her drunk texts. I don’t like going out very often, it stresses me out and I need to work. I ignored the text and continued walking.

I bolted and chained my door shut when I finally got into my apartment. I am now thankful of my decision to leave a few lights on while I was gone. My apartment is a lot less scary that way. I walked through my empty apartment making sure there were no intruders hiding. I have never been this paranoid in my entire life.

Once I finished making sure my apartment was completely safe, I crawled into bed. Today has felt like the longest day of my entire life. To say I’m exhausted is an understatement.

I’m standing in the clearing. Face-to-face with the girl. We are making eye contact this time. Nobody is moving. I’m not even sure I could get myself to move. I feel trapped. We stare at each other intensely for an awfully long time. “Who are you?” It came out more of a demand than a question but either way, she doesn’t respond. Shebreaks eye contact with me and looks past me over my shoulder. I force myself to look away from her. I look behind me and standing at the tree line of the forest is another girl. She is holding something in her left hand that is reflecting in the moonlight. She’s too far away for me to be able to see who she is or what she is holding but she looks weirdly familiar. Is this the person who is out to get me? I still can’t move. The other girl is moving from the tree line and the creepy girl in red pants is still staring at the girl. I look back at the girl in red pants. “Who is that?” Not really expecting an answer. Her blank eyes gaze into mine.

“Stay.” She whispers. I hesitate at first but then I start running. Should I have stayed there to see who the other girl is? It’s not like my body really gave me a choice in this matter. I’m running through the dark forest again. I can hear footsteps behind me again. I force myself to look back. The only thing I can see is long blonde hair.

I wake up. This time frustrated. How many more times am I going to have to have this dream before I get my answers? I grab my phone to check the time. 2:00 AM. I refuse to have another sleepless night. I pop a few melatonin pills and put my blanket over my head. I spent the rest of the night dreaming that I was having a stare down with the creepy girl with red pants in my room.

The next morning, I decided to skip my classes and call of work. Sleep deprivation is just as serious as something like the flu. It’s not like I will be any more productive when feeling like this. I spent the whole day looking up information on dreams and what they mean. I haven’t found any new information. I’m starting to feel defeated. I closed my laptop and set it beside me on my bed. I turned on my tv and quickly fell asleep to the background noise.

I ran up to the girl in red pants in the middle of the clearing. I didn’t hesitate. I grabbed her shoulders and looked her right in the eyes. “Who are you?” She didn’t respond. She broke eye contact and looked past me, at the other girl.

“She wants to kill you.” She whispered.

 “Who? Who wants to kill me?” I yelled. The girl looked past me again. I looked back and saw the blonde hair again. The girl started running at me. Everything went black as the girl tackled me down.

I woke up standing in my kitchen, staring at Rubie. I was holding a knife that was facing my torso. Rubie looks me dead in the eyes and says, “Do it.”

Circle K.

Sitting at the dining table was weird now, I officially live alone. I no longer have my best friends sharing a space with me. Being an adult was the strangest feeling I have ever felt, no more college or homework and now an official career that I was starting in the morning. To say I was nervous was a complete understatement. The only thing I could do at this point was to tryto remain calm, finish my dinner then get ready for bed.

I turned on my TV to have some background noise on. The only channels I have at the moment are the local news stations. Watching the news wasn’t a normal show for me to watch, but there was nothing else on this early in the morning. “Another girl kidnapped this week, this time on a college campus.” My eye nearly popped out of my head as the anchor read the headlines. I haven’t thought about that night in years, but sometimes something triggers the memory. A memory that I have tried to suppress and ignore. It was the night I refuse to talk about, even to my closest friends. The night I was almost kidnapped. It was the most traumatizing experience of my entire life. The memories came flooding back to me, every detail so perfect, that it was like I was still there,reliving the night over and over again.

It was the last weekend before the pressure of finals started up and the last weekend to have a social life before we all left campus to enjoy our summer vacation. The weather was finally nice enough to go out without a jacket. Leah and I decided to go out to the frats for the last time since our freshman year which is always a dumb mistake in the first place, but that wasn’t the only dumb mistake we made that night. We pre- gamed in Leah’s dorm before we left for the frats. We didn’t stay at the frats long; they were filled with more creepy men than usual and didn’t have any emotionally stable enough drunk girls to talk to. We obviously couldn’t let someone drive us home, Ubers are also becoming unsafe for girls to ride in, so we decided to walk back to the dorms. It started to rain halfway through our walk home. Everything seemed completely normal. We goofed around and just talked toeach other until we got to the brain statue. It seemed as if the air got colder and the wind started to pick up as we walked closer to the statue. A piece of paper was taped to it. People don’t usually tape flyers up there, so we decided to investigate. The alcohol in our systems made us think that this was a good idea. We pulled the note down and read it aloud:

“Both of you, go to Circle K and buy 2 liters of Coke. Then go behind the building, put the blindfolds on, and wait. You won’t wait long.”

 The dizziness I was experiencing made it hard for me to understand what the note was actually saying. I didn’t have any trigger warnings in my mind to tell me this was a horrible idea. I looked at Leah to see what her reaction was.

“It’s just one of the guys from the frat messing with us. Remember they mentioned doing stuff like this! It will be fun! Let’s go!” she cheered. I stupidly agreed with Leah and to this day I do not understand how I was drunk enough to believe her. I have never been this stupid before, even when I was more drunk than what I was in this moment.

We turned around and started walking towards Circle K. A white jeep kept coming into view, “it’s just the guys from the frat messing with us” Leah reassured me when I questioned her about the jeep, but I was starting to sober up and realizing that I did not feel safe in this moment.

By the time we got to the gas station, it was raining. We went in, just like the note told us to, and bought 2 liters of Coke, one vanilla and a regular one. When we checked out the cashier said something that should have tipped me off: “Wow, I guess a lot of girls just wanted some Coke tonight.” We laughed at his comment, just to be polite of course, and walked around the back. We instantly found the blindfolds sitting on some crates. We nervously looked around before sitting down and putting the blindfolds on.

“Are you sure this is a good idea?” I whispered. I was very much sober at this point and knew that I did not want to be here.

“Hell yes.” Leah responded. “We said we wanted to have fun tonight, it’s just the frat boys making tonight interesting.”

We sat in the rain for a while, shivering, and thinking about how dumb we were, or at least that was what I was thinking. We sat in the cold until we heard the back door of the gas station open and a car pulled up. “Um, what the hell are you doing?” The cashier yelled, or what I assume was the cashier based off his voice. The voice of a man that I did not recognized came out of nowhere. “They are with me.” His voice made my skin crawl, I felt Leah shift uncomfortably and I instantly knew that we had made a huge mistake. I was unsure of what to do but I knew we needed to get out of here. I quickly took the blindfold off and nudged Leah to do the same. We were met face to face with a huge man. A man that I did not know then but would forever haunt my dreams. He looked to be about six feet tall, very overweight, a beard that hasn’t been trimmed in months, and dark leather clothes. He had a lot of scars and bruises all over him, most of them looked fresh, like maybe they were from the girls that the cashier had joked about earlier. The scariest part about him was the gun hanging from his belt. Even if he didn’thave a gun, I was confident that he could and would kill me with his bare hands.

I looked at the cashier, I gave him a look that stated “help” but tried to make sure I wasn’t obvious about it. I looked back at the large man who was staring Leah and I down. The cashier, much smarter than me, took out his phone and discreetly started taking pictures of the man, then proceeded to yell for help inside. I was still frozen in fear but made sure to maintain eye contact with the terrifying man. One of the cashier’s coworkers started to run out to us but instantly ran back inside when she saw the situation. I have never been so scared in my entire life, my heart was beating a milliontimes per minute and I was struggling to breathe. Even though I was experiencing all of these emotions, I knew I would be safe. The cashier ran back out, this time holding a broom that I think he is planning on using as a weapon.

“Who are you?” the cashier questioned the man. The cashier didn’t look like he was worried, it was almost as if he had been through this before. It was kind of unsettling knowing that he was calm in this life-threatening situation. No one should have to know how to handle this and no would should ever have to go through this. He seemed so calm and collected, it was impressive.

The large man never answered, he never said a word, he just slowly backed up to his Jeep. “I said: Who are you?” The cashier now yelled. Sirens could be heard coming down the street. Leah and I were frozen in fear. He could do anything at this point, it’s obvious help is coming but his gun right there and ready to be fired. Everything started to move in slow motion. The large man looked in the direction of the sirens, looked at us, hesitated but ran to his car. He thought about killing us but decided against it, thank God! The cashier instantly started running after his car but was met by the dust the white jeep left behind.

I let out a sigh of relief when he was out of sight. Leah and I looked at each other and laughed, not the mostappropriate response to that night, but we had a lot of built up energy that had to come out. The cashier did not let his built-up energy out in the same way we did. He turnedaround, glared at us and started walking over to us.

“Y’all are stupid. You could have been killed! You could have gotten me killed!” He started to lecture us butwas interrupted by cop cars pulling up in all directions.

Everything was still moving in slow motion. Cops running up to us and surrounding the gas station. “Are you okay?” said the cop. I couldn’t think. Was I okay? I know I wasn’t physically hurt but what the hell did I get myself into tonight? I slighted nodded my head at the cop and she led us inside the gas station. I could tell that Leah was just as dazed and confused as me. We were given chairs and water. A group of people were in the gas station, most likely people who witnessed the jeep take off or were just innocent bystanders who just wanted to stock up on alcohol for the night. The cop tried to ask me questions, but I honestly couldn’t think. I was just waiting to wake up from this terrible dream.

I think the cop realized that I was struggling to comprehend what she was saying. She pulled me into the manager’s office to get me away from all the noise. It was nice to be out of the chaos. She told me to breathe. I tooka while but calmed down quite a bit.

She then sat me down to ask me questions. I honestly couldn’t remember those questions, even if my life depended on it. I am pretty sure I answered them to the best of my abilities, or at least to what the cop needed to hear.Honestly everything was just a blur.

I met back up with Leah and we were led to a cop car waiting outside. We got in and told the cop, I think she said her name was Officer Debra, where we lived. The whole ride home she lectured us on not doing anything stupid like that ever again, call her if we notice a white jeep following us, and to call her if we ever find a note like that again. I felt like a child being scolded but I guess I deserve it. We were incredibly stupid and were lucky that weweren’t killed.

After Officer Debra led me to my door, I went straight to bed when I got inside. I didn’t even let myself process what had happened. This was a night I had to forget, I’m not sure how I ever would but I couldn’t let that large man haunt my dreams for the rest of my life.

When I look back on that night, I can’t figure out how I got myself into that situation. I am thankful that I did make it out alive though. Who knows what could have happened to me if the cashier didn’t find us? I might not be alive anymore. But, ever since then I have been more careful about what I do and am more aware of mysurroundings.

Remembering Home

I take a look at my surroundings while biking to work, the realization is hitting me. This is the last time I will bike this route for a while, the last time I wave at the McNally’s as they sip their coffee on their front porch, and the last time I dodge tourists, cars, puddles, and pot-holes on the worn down back road. This will be my last time working at my favorite coffee shop and the last time I enjoy the warmth of the sun on my skin. Living on an island is not a typical experience, it’s definitely not one that many people dream of. It’s hot, boring, filled with crazy tourists, and island fever is a real thing. Some people experience cabin fever when they are stuck inside sick for multiple days in a row. I experience island fever, something that only comes when it starts to rain, or I have to work every single day of the week. It is an experience that not many people can understand. Imagine being trapped in a loop of having nothing to do and not having the option to go do anything. It comes when you have no opportunity to leave the island for a while and you are just stuck. Stuck driving around the 1-mile radius of town while praying that the rain will stop while talking aimlessly with friends. Once the rain starts, it seems like it never stops. The island floods and becomes very dark. The rain can go on forweeks at a time, and those few weeks feel like an eternity. Islands are usually a perfect vacation spot, not the location of your year-round home. Luckily for me, I have an out soon. School is starting, and I finally get to leave the island to get a higher education. It’s an opportunity that not many people here get, and if they do, they rarely take it. I am excited to have classes that consist of more than 10 people and finally graduating with a class of more than 20. I am going to miss my home but at the same time, I am excited to leave and see what the world has to offer. As cheesy as that may sound.

My parents moved to this island off the coast of North Carolina before I was born. They came from Haiti to seek a better life. A tiny island is the perfect place to raise a family. It’s safe and has a great sense of community to help look after the young kids. As soon as they got here, they found jobs, got married, bought a house, and started a family consisting of three sons and two daughters. My parents have done everything they could to give us kids the future they never had. They want us all to leave this island to get an education and see the world. My being the oldest means that I have to face the world with no one to give me advice on things I won’t know I need advice on. I may only be going up the beach to a college four hours away, but it still seems like a world away.

My parents want me to become a doctor and I have always wanted to do whatever it takes to please them.Being a doctor isn’t exactly my dream job or anything, but it will bring in a nice income which I can use to take care of my parents when they get old. They have dedicated their entire lives to making sure myself and my siblings will live an incredible life without the stress of money. They do nothing but work had to build up a saving account which is only to be used for furthering our education. If they want me tobecome a doctor, I will become a doctor. I can’t let them down after they risked everything to come to America.

I arrive at the coffee shop 10 minutes early, typical for me since being late is one of my biggest fears. I walk through the door and was welcomed by the friendly “good mornings” from the bakers, Amy and Christine. I take a look at the pastries that would be out today, took a fig muffin (an island specialty), and walk to the front of the store.Lily is already there, working hard to get the coffee brewed and start making the drinks of a few locals who come early every day. We make simple small talk as I munched down on my breakfast. We were avoiding the subject of my leaving, and instead talking about the weather. Today was the first day that it wasn’t downpouring while I biked to work.

Luckily, morning shifts were simple before the shop opened for business promptly at 7 o’clock AM. Myself, Wade, and Keegan have to arrive at 6:30 AM. Laura has to be there at 6 o’clock AM, she gets there thirty minutes before the rest of us to get the coffee pots and espresso machine turned on and warmed up. Laura is always very efficient so; all we have to do is switch out the coffee pots when they finish brewing.

The thirty minutes before the coffee shop opens is like the calm before the storm. The island is still quiet, the coffee shop is only filled with the employees, and we just sit around a chat while we eat breakfast. About five minutes before the coffee shop opens, the locals start to gather on the porch. Bennett, the owner of the surf shop, writes the day’s surf report on the surfboard shaped white board. Ace, a person that we don’t know what he does or where he came from but always has the coolest stories to tell and loves to tell the other locals about a new book he has read. And lastly there is Jack, the husband of the Justine. Justine owns the coffee shop which means that Jack could comein and get his coffee before the crowd but her prefers to wait for us to open. Something about not wanting to have special treatment because his wife is the owner, but he is probably out there telling a lame dad joke to the rest of the locals who give him a pity laugh before going back to their regular conversation. Those people plus a few others who aren’t as talkative are here every morning. No matter what.

My shift ends as quickly as it started. The line never ended and some of the tourists were unbearably rude but, the never-ending line is now the afternoon crew’s problem. I know that the end of this shift isn’t goodbye, I still have the rest of today and most of tomorrow left to say my goodbyes and pack my things, so I act normal. I make myself a smoothie, one that isn’t on the menu. It’s a personal creation that I have been trying to get Justine to add to the selection. It’s a combination of lemonade, apple juice, mangos, raspberries, strawberries, pineapples, and spirulina. It blends up to be a gross looking green color, but it always tastes delicious.

I grab my bike and head back home. I am not going to stay at home for very long, just long enough to get ready for the beach. This will probably be my last beach day; the rain is supposed to start again tomorrow. What adepressing way to say my goodbyes!

I get a text from my friend Josie, saying that the waves were amazing, so I should bring my board. Josie changes her hair color about every week. The last time I saw her it was rainbow, there is no telling what it will ever be since she always changes it late at night. The waves are rarely surfable, they are either way too small or so rough that it’s too dangerous to even wade in the water. I grabbed my towel and my board before heading to meet Josie and Paige. Paige is from Georgia. She’s just here for the summer which is a bummer. She’s a lot of fun to be around though. She’s very artistic. At night, we sometimes sneak into the old, World War Two bunkers that are hidden from the tourists to give them a little “spruce” and just hang out away from the hubbub of the touristy town.

The beach is incredible. The waves aren’t huge, that only happens when there is a hurricane somewhere off the coast, but they are solid. We surf as long as we can, but we just cannot stop talking. We are getting in our last gossip sessions of the summer in and we plan when we would visit each other. This is getting too real. All three of us are going to be in different places all over the country. I’m so used to seeing them every day. We work together, surf together, get dinner together, and do pretty much everything else together. Josie plans on staying here. She’s not ready to experience life off the island. It’s way too scary for her. It’s a good terrifying for me, though. A type ofterrifying that needs to be faced. Although, I’m not sure if I am ready to face the world off the island, but it has to come sooner or later.

We continue to float on our boards while we talked and occasionally surfed a wave until the sun started to set. We mostly talked about how jealous I was that Josie’s parents were giving her a choice on what she wanted to do now that we graduated High School. My parents have made it clear that they have always wanted me to be a doctor but have never exactly said I had to do it. I have never expressed to them that I wanted to do something else.There’s not really anything else that I can see myself doing. I just knew since I was a young child that I would make my parents proud. When the sky started to turn that pinkish orange color, we decided to head in. This is the time when the sharks come closer to the shore to feed. We didn’t want to leave the water, but we also didn’t want to be shark bait. We walked up to the dunes where our bikes were and biked home.

My Mom had made dinner a few hours before I had gotten home. She heated a plate up for me and proceeded to lecture me on everything I should be scared of on the mainland.

“Don’t talk to any men on the streets.” “Carry pepper spray with youeverywhere.”

“Don’t leave your valuables anywhere out of sight.” Were just a few of the things that I knew but she felt necessary to lecture me on. People on this island have a false sense of reality to any place off this island. We are really trusting of other when on the island, but as soon as we step off, we assume everyone is looking to murder or mug us. Sometimes I wonder how I ever made it to this point in my life and am still normal.

After my Mom’s lecture, I go to my room to finish packing. My blue walls are bare, and the only thing left untouched is my bed. Which I would tear down in the morning. I put the last few items left in my room in a box and take it to my already very packed car. I look at the clear night sky, filled with millions of stars, one last time and go back inside to go to bed.

I have very simple dreams that night. I dream about when Josie and I were kids. We would bike to the lifeguard beach during the summer while our parents were at work. All we would bring is a packed lunch and atowel. We would splash around in the waves, build sandcastles, and search for shells. I was taught at a young age to never take shells from the beach. They are essential to the health of the ecosystem and prevent erosion of the shoreline. In all my years of living here I have only taken 6 shells. 4 of them were found during my yearly beach walk on my birthday, 1 was found the day mygrandmother passed away, and 1 was found when Josie and I snuck out of the house for the first time. We wanted to walk the beach during a full moon. Our parents said it was unsafe to walk the beach at night, but we did it anyways. It was one of the most magical nights of my life.

It was also the same night that my mom told my family that I was going to be a doctor one day. Now that my extended family knew I would be a doctor there was no turning back. I asked God for a sign of hope and a few seconds later a beautiful conch shell washed up on shore. I have always questioned if there was a God and to this day, I am still not sure, but that conch has always been my good luck charm. A sign of hope that whatever I end updoing with my life is exactly what I need to be doing.

I have that conch packed away and know that it would sit on my nightstand.

 Having it with me also makes me feel like Josie is with me. Knowing that Josie is doing exactly what she wanted to do, even if it isn’t what her parents had planned, gives me hope that I am doing exactly what I wanted to do. Even if I have no idea what I want to do yet.

This is it. This is goodbye. I have been preparing for this moment for a week now. I have officially said goodbye to everyone on the island, well besides the tourists, and my car is completely packed. The only people I need to say goodbye to are my parents. The hardest goodbye of them all. I have always been more of a homebody. I love this island, as much as I complain about it, I still love it with all my heart. It’s all I know and I’m not so sure I’m ready for this change now. I thought I was but saying goodbye to everyone makes everything more real and much more terrifying.

This island is my home. I don’t want to leave my friends who are basically my family and my family. It’s going to be hard leaving my home, the ocean, and the coffee shop. I’m going to miss checking the surf report every morning. Going on bike and car rides are the nightly routine and I’m not sure I can go without it.

I guess it is time to finally say goodbye, get on the ferry, and start my new journey. A journey of becomingthe doctor my parents have always wanted me to be.

Ciao, Ciao for Now Chapter 1: Nicola

I sat patiently waiting at my gate while staring out the window at the beautiful city I am about to leave. Once I step onto the plane, I will be one step closer to arriving at the next phase of my life. The next 13 hours will be grueling but worth it. I don’t know exactly what I am looking for or why exactly I am leaving. I just know that for whatever reason I was leaving for has been calling to me since I was a young child.

“Flight 247 from Rome to Toronto is now boarding” came booming through the loudspeaker, pulling me out of my thoughts. I grabbed my personal item and small bag before getting up to stand in the ticket line.

The line moved quickly, and my ticket scanned even quicker. I paused and looked back at my city andwhispered “Ciao, ciao for now Roma” before boarding the plane.

The plane ride was just like any other plane ride; long, boring, and with questionable chicken. Luckily, I had an aisle seat. Aisle seats are the best during long flights because you get more leg room and easy access to the restroom. I slept for most of the flight and watched movies the rest of the time. The turbulence wasn’t that bad, it was the perfect amount to rock you to sleep without making you feel like the plane would crash at any given moment.

After what felt like forever, we started to descend. I got a quick glimpse of the city as we landed. Snow covered the ground and all the buildings. This is something I am going to have to get used to, I guess. I knew snow would be a huge part of living here when I made the decision, but I thought I would have some time to prepare, I mean it’s only November! My winter coat was the main thing taking up all the space in my carryon bag so I guess I will have to pull that out while I wait for the rest of my luggage.

I waited for the majority of the passengers to exit the plane before I got up. We all have to wait the same amount of time trying to get through customs and then at baggage claim so what’s the rush? The people sitting next to me didn’t seem to have the same mindset as me based on their huffs and puffs but they didn’t say anything to make me act differently. It’s not like I will ever see those people again.

Customs would be a much harder process this time around, probably because I am moving to the country this time instead of just visiting for a vacation. I made sure to have all my paperwork ready and organized to keep the process moving. My roommate, Rebecca, who I have yet to meet in person is meeting me at baggage claim. She kept texting me saying that she is here and waiting. I was nervous about meeting her, so I wasn’t praying that thisline moved any faster. I would feel more at ease about moving here if I knew who I was going to be living with or if I was living alone. Toronto has extremely expensive housing, so I had no choice but to get a roommate and none of my friends back home were ready for such a big change.

It’s normal to live with your parents till your married in Italy so it’s a weird concept for me to be moving out of the country alone at the age of 23. My parents are weirdly supportive of me. Most Italian parents want their kids to take over the family business and never move away. I think my parents see this as an opportunity for me tobring them more business or send home money, so they don’t have to work as much. Either way, I am happy that they are helping me do this. I love Italy but it feels so small sometimes. It’s almost as if everyone around me is trapped into living the exact same lives all their ancestors lived.

I walked off the plane and immediately got into the never-ending line that lead to the intimidating border patrol officers. It’s not like I have anything to hide but they make me feel like I am. The worst that they could do with my personal record is send me back to Italy for no reason. I just have a lot of unnecessary anxiety.

I’ve always struggled with feeling anxious all the time. My parents have never believed in therapy, so I have just been looking things up online. I have learned a few coping mechanisms and other ways to help. I also learned that getting out of your comfort zone is a good way to push yourself into doing thing that scare you to tell your mind that there is nothing to worry about when things go right. That’s the whole reason as to why I came to Canada. I’m just struggling with how to convince my brain that this will turn out well.

I texted Rebecca to let her know that I was in line for customs and that it would probably be a while. She texted back immediately to tell me that she was fine with that and she was going to find a coffee shop in the airport to wait at. I ended the conversation with a quick “cool, see you soon!” and put my ear buds in to listen to music. I’ve been trying to prepare myself for living in a different culture to what I am used to, so I’ve been listening to Canadian bands and other podcasts. I let The Tragically Hip play the entire time I stood in line.

One hour later I finally got through the line. There were no issues with my paperwork, and I am good to live here for the next few years. I had to take a quick test to prove I could speak English well enough to work here. I started to learn English when I was 5 so it was no problem for me. I told Rebecca I was through and at baggage claim waiting for my luggage. I didn’t really know who to look for when she does get here. I’ve talked to her on thephone a few times, but we could never get skype to work. The internet in Rome can be dicey sometimes so I wasn’tshocked when it wouldn’t work.

It only took a few minutes for my suitcase to come around on the belt. I struggled to get my 85-pound suitcase off but with the help of gravity, I pulled it off enough for it to fall on to the ground. My suitcase was a beautiful turquoise blue color with a white leather strap going vertically down the center of the front. I used this description to help Rebecca find me. It was better than saying “I am wearing a black coat and have long black hair” because there are multiple people here with that exact description of their person.

A few minutes after texting Rebecca the description of my suitcase, a tall skinny girl with brown hair camebouncing up to me.

“Nicola?” The girl asked.

“Rebecca?” I questioned right back. Rebecca grew a huge smile once she knew who I was and embraced me into a huge hug.

“Oh my gosh! It’s so nice to finally meet you!” She screeched! I was excited to meet her too, but my lack of energy was making it hard for me to express that.

I broke off the hug and grabbed the handle of my suitcase. Indicating that I was ready to get out of theairport.

“I am so excited to meet you and be here!” I struggled to get out my words. Since English is my second language certain words are hard for me to pronounce. There are five letters in the English alphabet that are not in the Italian alphabet which have always given me some trouble. Although, Rebecca didn’t seem to mind. She grabbed my suitcase from my hand and started to walk towards the exit.

 We made random small talk about how my flight went and about our lives in general while we walked to her car. I learned that she is from a small town near Nova Scotia and came to Toronto to find a job in publishing novels. She currently works as an assistant to the boss of the company and is hoping to work her way up in the business. She needed a roommate because her job doesn’t pay her enough to afford an apartment in the city alone and since she just moved here, she didn’t know anybody to ask which made her post the listing online. She seems like a super nice girl. I am still super nervous about living with someone that I don’t know but I guess you got to do what you got to do in order to make your dreams come true.

It took about 20-minutes to find her car in the parking garage. We had parking garages in Italy but never tothis extent. We also don’t have the room to be putting large parking garages in everywhere. Her car is a blue Subaru outback which is covered in mud and some snow that hasn’t melted off yet. It was a pretty big car for just one person, but I guess that’s the norm here. Rebecca put my bags into the back of her car, and we took off for her, I guess it’s now our, apartment.

The roads are super icy and covered in snow. It makes me nervous to drive on. I don’t understand know Rebecca is remaining so calm, just being in the passenger seat is making me nervous.

“Are you hungry?” Rebecca asked me.

 “Starving.” I jokingly replied. Rebecca chuckled and started listing off some places we could get food from and the different types of food that they had. I wasn’t really sure what to pick so I let her pick for me. Since we were both super tired, she ended up going through a McDonald’s drive through and ordered us something called poutine. She said it was basically just French fries, cheese, and gravy. It didn’t sound that appetizing to me but at this point I don’treally care. Greasy food will help warm me up.

“I set up an air mattress for you. I didn’t know when you would be getting a bed so I wanted to make sure you would be comfortable.” Rebecca said after a while of us sitting in silence.

“Thank you! I am going to find a mattress store sometime this week.” I replied back graciously.

“I know of a few good ones. I can take you to them if you would like?” she offered. I accepted her offer and we were back to sitting in silence again. It wasn’t awkward or anything, I think we were both just tired and overwhelmed about the new situation.

The apartment is small but cozy. It’s a two-bedroom, 1 bath and with a nice view of the city. Rebecca claims that the kitchen is super outdated because we have a cheaper rent than others but it’s the nicest kitchen that I haveever seen in a home. She gave me a brief tour and then helped me put my bags in my room then offered to reheat our food while I settle in a bit. She kept the apartment heat on which was a nice surprise to walk into. I took off myshoes and coat then headed to the kitchen.

“Have you ever had poutine before?” Rebecca asked while she was transferring the now warm food onto areal plate.

“I have not. It’s not really a common food combination in Italy.” I said as I grabbed the plate from herhands once she handed it to me.

“Well, I hope you like it!” She started eating hers, so I just smiled and took a bite.

 It was good but extremely salty. I would most likely eat it again on a super cold night.

 We ate our food while Rebecca asked me random questions about Italy and why I left and other questions like that. I just told her that I needed a change of scenery. I didn’t really feel like making small talk. I was exhausted. Rebecca claimed she was tired earlier but now it doesn’t seem like it. She has a ton of energy and won’t stop talking. She is making plans for all the things and places that she wants me to try and visit. Everything sounded like fun. It was different kinds of food, drinks, and winter sports that are popular in Canada. She also invited me to go with her to a pub tomorrow night to meet her friends and watch a hockey game on the television. I accepted her offer then told her that I would like to go to bed. I barely slept on the plane ride over and am very jet lagged. It’s around 3:00AM back home.

It didn’t take long for me to get ready for bed. I had some toiletries and a pair of pajamas in my carry on. I planned that on purpose so I wouldn’t have to dig through my suitcase on my first night here. I did however want to take a shower. I don’t own any towels yet, but Rebecca was generous enough to let me borrow one. I didn’t have any shower supplies, so I just rinsed off and enjoyed the warm of the water on my skin. Even though the heat was on, I was still freezing. I’m sure after a while of being here I will get used to it.

Once I finished getting ready for bed, I laid down on the air mattress and curled up under the blankets thatRebecca gave me. I fell asleep within a few minutes of laying down.

I had an alarm go off on my phone at 9:00 AM. It was still set from having to wake-up every day for work back home. I turned it off and almost went back to sleep but something in my mind told me I should get up to get adjusted to the time zone. I had weird dreams all night, so I am kind of happy I am awake now. I had one dream thatI was running home, I ran on top of water just so I wouldn’t have to stay here. I don’t think it was one of thosedreams that is subconsciously trying to tell me to leave. I think it’s just normal anxiety about moving 7, 077 KM away from home. I’m not sad about leaving home, I just miss my family a little. Okay, maybe a lot but that doesn’t mean I am going to run back home and give up on why I came here. I may not know exactly why I am here yet, but Ido know that whatever the reason is I know I will find it here, in Toronto.

I sent my parents a message to give them an update on how everything is. I kept it vague. Once emotions got involved, I would start to get homesick. I just needed to stay busy until I am adjusted to living here. Luckily,Rebecca has the day off from work today. She doesn’t have to work weekends which is nice. I feel bad that she is using her days off to help me settled in. She claims that she doesn’t mind but I still feel bad. We are going to a store called IKEA today. Rebecca says they have nice furniture for cheap. As long as it’s cheap I don’t care what it lookslike.

I got ready for the day then walked out of my room and into the kitchen. I am wearing jeans, a t-shirt, and sneakers. Rebecca took one look at my outfit, shook her head no, then walked into her room.

“I don’t care how thick of a winter coat you brought. I cannot let you leave this house and freeze in that.” She yelled from her room. I was confused but I guess she knows the weather best. She walked out of her roomcarrying a sweater and some boots.

“What shoe size are you?” she questioned.

 “Typically, a size 37.” She looked shocked at my answer then a look of relief went across her face as she pulled out her phone. She typed on her phone for a minute or two before looking back at me.

“Okay, that converts to a size 7 over here which is what I am! You can borrow these boots until you get your own. If we have time do you want to go clothes shopping as well?” She asked as she walked back to the kitchen counter to take a sip from her coffee mug.

“Yeah, I would like to unpack and see if you think any of the clothes, I have would be suitable. We have winterback home, but I guess it isn’t the same thing as winter here.

“I’m guessing our winters are very different as well but I’m sure you have some stuff that could work. Doyou at least have a good pair of snow boots?” She asked.

“Snow boots?” I’ve only worn a pair of snow boots on a family vacation once to go skiing. They aren’treally sold back home.

“Yeah, it’s the only way you can walk on the sidewalk here without falling. We will find you a pair while we are out today.” Rebecca stated. I couldn’t help but smile at her. She was very kind and just wanted to help me out. She knew I am going through a huge transition in life and wanted to make it as easy as possible for me.

“Also, your first couple of days here, we are going to hit all the stereotypical Canadian hot spots! I don’t care how cheesy some of them may be!” She laughed as she said it which made me laugh. I was excited to get to know the city and country.

Before we went to the store, Rebecca stopped at Tim Hortons to get us breakfast. I’m not really one to eat breakfast every day but the cold made me hungry. I wondered how long it would take for me to adjust to living there and go back to my normal eating schedule. I liked all the food that I was eating but it’s much more processed and saltier than what I was used to.

The car ride wasn’t terribly long. I got to know Rebecca a lot more. I think living with her is going to be fun. I am really happy that I found her ad online when looking for places to stay. She said there’s a job opening up in a different department at her work and she thought I should apply for it. I don’t have much experience with publishing or anything along those lines, but I guess I will just apply and see what happens. I’m not really sure what kind of job I would like to be doing, I will just apply to all the ones that sound interesting to me and see if anything comesof it. The only work experience I have s working for my father’s panini shop. Food service isn’t the best thing to only have on a resume but at least it’s something.

Rebecca who has now asked me to call her Becca said that as long as I stand out during an interview my experience doesn’t matter all that much. I still want my resume to stand out though, I won’t get an interview if Idon’t at least make a decent first impression on paper. I’m trying not to worry about it, but I also don’t want to be stuck in food service again. Becca pulled me from my thoughts when she started talking again.

“So, I asked my friend Liam to meet us at the store to help us carry some furniture to the car then up to our apartment. I hope you don’t mind.” She said in a slightly worried tone.

“It’s no problem at all! I am excited to meet more people.” I replied back. “Great! You’re going to lovehim!” she said more enthusiastically this time.

I’m still super nervous to meet him though. It’s not that I am shy or anything, I just prefer to spend time alone. It’s what helped make my decision to move here a little easier. I am not worried about making friends super quickly. I would be fine if the only friend I made was Becca for a while; or at least until I am settled in and comfortable with being here.

After about 30 minutes of driving and sipping on a cup of coffee we arrived at the store. Becca suggested that we wait in the car for a few minutes until Liam arrived but that ended about 10 minutes after we got here. He is apparently late to everything. Not because he doesn’t care but because he is super busy all the time. I’m not typically one to be late to anything, it stresses me out too much but I’m not trying to judge him before I meet him. I guess I will just hold all thoughts until he shows up and I get to officially meet him.

Ciao, Ciao for Now Chapter 2: Rebecca

Nicola and I arrived at IKEA and started shopping; my friend Liam should be here soon. I really hope that she likes him. I don’t want there to be any awkwardness for her at the pub tonight. Hopefully her knowing more than one person that will be there will help ease her mind about going. I understand that it can be nerve wracking meeting a ton of new people all at once. That’s how I was with this group of friends when I came to the city and I definitely don’t want her to feel the same way I did.

We continued to walk through the store while waiting for Liam to show up. It’s typical of him to be late so I’m not worried about him not showing. I usually give him 10 minutes to show up before I just go about my business. If I waited for him to show up, I would never get anything done.

I am not really sure what her style is. I keep asking her what she likes but it seems like she doesn’t know either. I really like Nicola. She seems sweet but she is also super quiet. I wonder if she is just nervous about being here and now living with someone she doesn’t really know. I am nervous about it too, but I am trying to be as social as possible to make the transition a little easier on the both of us. The last thing I wanted was to have a roommate, but pricing here is way more expensive than what I can afford. After living in a small town where everybody knows everybody and living with nosy parents I just want to be on my own. I’m 22 years old now and don’t want to feel like I am still at a university or living back home. I’m sure having a roommate will have more benefits than just lower rent, so I amtrying to give it a fair chance. It’s just hard when she is so quiet.

“Guys! Wait!” I heard being yelled across the room. I knew that voice and it could only be the voice of Liam. I turned around and waved at him.

“That’s my friend Liam.” I said to Nicola. She nodded in response but didn’t say anything. I am guessing she is just nervous. Liam is very handsome, dark curly hairs and eyes and a jaw line that could cut glass. He easilymakes everyone he talks to nervous.

Maybe I should have picked a different friend to come help. It might have made her feel more welcomed to have somebody less intimidating to meet but he was the only one who was free at this time.

Liam caught up to us and I introduced Nicola to him. Liam is very good at socializing which made it easy for Nicola to talk to him because she just had to nod along and agree or disagree with what his is saying. She mostly just agreed with what he was saying. Probably just so she didn’t have to talk as much. I’ve done that so many timesthat I completely understand why she would just nod along with whatever he is rambling on about. He could talk about anything and everything without having the other person even acknowledge that he is talking. I could tell Liam liked Nicola though. He is terrible at hiding his body language when it comes to these things. He constantly runs his fingers through his brown curly hair and fidgets with his coat zipper. In the two months that I have been here I have only seen him do this with one other girl. She was here on vacation with her family and Liam could not have been more head over heels for her. I think he was considering moving to the states to be with her. I am so gladhe didn’t. It would have ended badly and he’s my best friend, so I am going to be a bit selfish and hope he doesn’t leave the city for a while.

“Are you guys excited for HOCKEY!!!!!!” Liam yelled. This was normal so we didn’t get any weird looks.Instead a few people cheered along with him.

“Yeah! But I’ve never watched a hockey game before.” Nicola stated making Liam look crushed.

“You’ve never seen a hockey game?!?” Liam said as he stopped in his tracks and turned towards Nicola.

“It’s not a thing in Italy. We really only care about fútbol.” She said, shrugging. Nicola looks shocked at Liam’s response. This was typical for him. He cares way too much about hockeysometimes. He is basically just like an American who loves football.

“You are missing out of life, man!” Liam gave Nicola a bit of a shoulder tap as he said it. He is totally crushing on her.

“Don’t listen to him. He’s just man in love with watching other men beat each other up while skating around on ice.” I joked.

“Har. Har.” Liam said sarcastically.

 “Well, let’s hurry up then. It would be just a shame if we missed the hockey game tonight because we were still standing here discussing how Nicola has never watched a hockey game.” I said in an even more sarcastic tone than what Liam had before. Liam gave me a joking glare. It’s not that I don’t like watching hockey. I just don’t need to watch every single game and obsess over the players. We continued to walk around the store and Liam pointed out all the different options that Nicola could go with. I was half paying attention to what they were doing. I instead was trying to come up with a plan on how to get these two together. I had the inner debate of if I should let it play out on its own and see what happens or if I should meddle. I decided on giving them a month to make it happen on their own before I would step in. I am hoping Liam will just go for it and make the first move, but he might chicken out if he really does like her. Boys can be weird like that sometimes.

We arrived back at my apartment hours later. Nicola wasn’t too picky once she finally figured out that everything in IKEA is customizable. Liam helped us carry everything into our apartment then offered to help Nicola build everything. He was definitely crushing on her. We had a few hours before the hockey game starts which we planned on using to build her furniture. That way she could unpack and get settled in while I am at work tomorrow. Hopefully her being alone in the apartment and being able to put her stuff in a place other than her suitcase would make her feel more at home. I could tell that she is still not comfortable about being here which is totally understandable. I just hoped her adjustment is quick and she feels at home here soon.

Moving to the city from Nova Scotia was terrifying enough. I couldn’t imagine moving here from the other side of the world. I’m wasn’t even sure if she had even been to Toronto before or even Canada. If she has, she definitely wasn’t here for long. She barely knew what hockey was let alone what poutine was. Poutine is a Canadian classic! I couldn’t imagine a world without it, but I guess she felt the same way about something from her country.

We actually had a lot of fun when we built her furniture. We listened to some music, some Nicola already knew, and just got to know each other a lot more. Liam has already started to flirt with her. I wanted things to workout but him starting to flirt withher so soon might scare her off since she had only been here for a day. I’m sure it will be fine though; I’ll mention that he should tone it down a bit next time I get him alone.

Today has gone by so fast that I almost forgot about lunch. Nicola and Liam haven’t mentioned anything about being hungry. Liam is always hungry; I’m guessing he just doesn’t want to look like a pig in front of his new crush. Nicola is super thin. I wonder if she is just not used to eating a lot during the day. I met one girl from Italy afew years ago and she was the exact same. I was told that they don’t typically eat breakfast and they just wait till lunch. Nicola ate breakfast so I’m guessing she is just still full of that. I however was not full of the small breakfast sandwich I had earlier and went to the kitchen to make some soup. I offered some to the other two, but bothdeclined.

Liam watched me eat as if he was a child watching their parent eat all their Halloween candy. He just needs to man up and eat in front of her.

A few hours later we started to get ready to head to the pub for the game. I made sure that Liam was with us when we were going to leave so he would be on time. Last time he was late to a game he complained the whole time about missing the first 10 minutes. I already don’t care about watching the game, I shouldn’t have to listen to Liam gripe about more than what he has to. Toronto is good but they still make mistakes that cause Liam to yell at the TV out of frustration. Nicola was in for a treat watching that tonight.

I let Nicola borrow one of my jerseys to wear to the pub. Once we were all ready, we start to walk down the street in the snow. I just hope this night goes well. Last time a new member joined our group, things didn’t quite go to plan.